Witches, goblins and ghosts of times past

Almost a month ago, as I joined the celebration of some ancient Gaelic tradition of killing animals for the winter (much like the Newfoundland tradition of catching fish for the winter) and recognizing the last day of October as a day when the line between this world and another becomes blurred, I wondered what would happen if this tradition were invented today.

I imagined children coming home from school with letters to their parents in their backpacks explaining the nature of this "holiday" (as the popular misnomer has it). The phones in the schools would not stop ringing.

"You expect us to buy candy for children we don't even know? And how much should we buy?"

"Does it have to be candy? Can we buy something else?"

"We have to buy a uniform for this? Doesn't the school know how much these costumes cost? They'll be worn about as often as a wedding dress."

"My children have allergies!"

"Let me tell you: We are a Christian family and we don't want our children involved in this sacrilege."

The complaints would not stop there. Halloween Night is a dangerous time. Children with covered faces walking in the streets darting about looking for more candy may not pay attention to traffic. This year the media seemed to be more insistent than ever that children need to be careful. Parents should accompany them. Lights (battery powered only) should be carried and even placed in the bottom of the loot bags, so that the kids are always visible.

Be careful about the strange man who may like more about the children than their just-for-tonight alter egos. Be doubly careful about the possibility of some foreign object being hidden in a treat. Don't eat anything until your parents check your stuff.

Read the labels. Can the children eat nuts? Eat something that was manufactured in the same province as something containing nuts? Are they lactose intolerant? What the heck is red dye and why should I care?

Then there is the attitude of the visitors to our house. Their mantra is "Trick-or-treat" which is a threat to get candy, and although most children are not going to follow through on the threat, it does happen.

Years ago, neighbourhoods were more suited for this activity than they are today.

Everybody had children and as we gave candy to our neighbour's children they were giving candy to ours. Today many homes have no children, and the origin of Halloween is a dim memory. It isn't only the neighbours' kids who come to our houses, but kids we won't see again until next Halloween because they do not live where we live. They are dropped in to collect our treats and then are whisked away by their parents.

Children who did not exist last Halloween are dressed like lambs (or as I though I heard one day, like "lamps", which I thought much more creative… and amusing) or kittens or mice, and they apparently love candy. Children-as-props is a neat concept, and takes parenthood to a new level.

I am convinced, however, that the same parents who dress up their little ones, provide them with a pumpkin bucket, and think it is just precious to take them from door to door would go ballistic if their children's school were to invent a new Halloween.

We are often not very consistent in what we think is good or bad. There is no doubt that children like the idea of going from door to door getting free candy, but because children like it doesn't mean it is a good idea. Parents say "No" to a lot of things children think is great. A major problem is that parents do not say "No" often enough. Being a parent means setting limits and explaining that although things are being done, you, my child, are not going to do it.

Perhaps it is time to end Halloween. That won't happen, of course, because too many people think sending their kids around the neighborhood to collect candy is a great idea. Kids really need more candy. And they certainly need a night to have strangers fill that need.

We know that Halloween will stay on the calendar. But I wonder what would happen if a school sent a letter home to the parents telling them that on Nov. 5, 1605, a disgruntled crowd conspired to blow up the British House of Parliament, and that the school would like to commemorate that event by having our students light fires.

The fires would be small, lit in back yards, and there should be no shortage of fuel available for the back yard festivities. Surely, any history lesson is a good one.
If that idea doesn't fly perhaps the school could try again with a real holiday, the celebration of which could include a healthy expedition in the great outdoors to cut a tree. The children could bring these trees home, hang lights, icicles and other decorations on them, and after about a week, toss them in the garbage …or if things are good, in the recycle bin.

On second thought, that would never work.

We are much too politically correct and environmentally sensitive for that.

Jim King lives in Corner Brook and
is a member of The Western Star's
Community Editorial Board.